Rude awakening for Bobbe

Funeral for a friend...

I think I have been living an overly-romanticized view of Indonesia. Maybe it’s because I love the good parts of the culture so much, I have blatantly ignored all the bad parts.

Well, the bad stuff has grown like a cancer, and is now killing off the rest of the culture that I once enjoyed.

Indonesia has the curse of all the problems of a modern civilization (pollution, overcrowding, filth, disease) without any of the actual “civilization” benefits, like health care, ecology concerns or environmental philosophy. Oh, most Asian countries have some sort of low grading curve, i.e. dial-up internet, old technology, makeshift lifestyles that imitate American standards with much cheaper parts. But Indonesia always gets the WORST parts first, and spirals downward from there.

I see this problem in three separate but equally responsible components:

1: The Government is entirely Muslim, and cannot stop fighting amongst itself long enough to address what’s left of it’s nation.
2: The people are culturally-bound to traditions that, although were once quite valid, now serve no purpose but genocide.
3: The general attitude of both the populace and the Government is “So what, who cares? We need money more than we need health care.”

Jakarta is the same as it has always been: A cesspool. It’s a typical overcrowded city filled with disease and pollution. The air is much thicker & darker than L.A., and you cannot actually WALK anywhere, without threat of being run down by an over-zealous minibus, or the moped swerving to avoid it. Of course, being an American, I attract attention worse than a hooker in Sunday school. Every taxi pulls over, whether I hail it or not, and asks if I want a ride. They seem sincerely befuddled when I say I prefer to walk, as if this is unthinkable to them. Police will pull over & get off their cheap motorcycles just to stop me & practice their engrish, or tell me where I can find some cheap Indonesian girls. Do I like Indonesian girls? How about boys? Jeez, I dunno, isn’t that punishable by DEATH under Muslim law? Yes, but it’s okay, no have to worry! I am policeman!

Ummm, y’know what? I’ll just keep it in my pants, thanks!

The place that just broke my heart was Bandung. Once the flower in the heart of the country, it is a wilted weed that is rapidly becoming “Jakarta Jr.” Like most cities in Indonesia, the sewage is an open river running parallel along either side of the street. Anything and everything floats down this disgusting drainage, and the smell is overpowering. I understand this little idea is a gift from the thoughtful Dutch, who initially brought civilization to the noble savages of the Nusantara. Thanks guys, but you should have stopped at the “cheese goes with everything” philosophy.

Smoking is huge in Indonesia, most people start by age 10. There is no such thing as a “No Smoking” section, and it’s quite disgusting to see a group of kids sharing a cigarette in a playground. Most restaurants are so polluted, I just called in an order & got it to go. Also, there are absolutely no litter laws; the ground is covered in old wrappers, newspapers, and debris of all kinds. If an Indonesian is eating something out of a wrapper, wherever he finishes it is where that wrapper is going to fall, period. As a result of this, there are miles of litter all over the road & countryside, wherever the populace is larger than 50 people. But the worst part is the garbage piles. Every night, the people of Bandung pile their rubbish in the street. The piles are a little larger than a two car garage, spaced about 100 yards apart. ANYTHING could be in these piles, and every night they set fire to them & the ash covers the city. In ten years, Bandung will have all the toxicity of Jakarta. I shudder to think what Jakarta will look like then.

Something funny about Indonesian in general: The water is polluted, & the only water native Indo’s drink is the bottled variety. Of course, this extends to ice as well, you are only drinking a frozen version of polluted water. Well, I discovered the strangest thing: Indonesians won’t think twice about offering you a drink with ice in it, and seem genuinely surprised when you refuse, or ask for “Tampa Es” (No ice, please). However, offer THEM the same glass & they’ll say “Oh no, water is bad”. THEN WHY DID YOU OFFER IT TO ME, MORON??!?

There are still some good places left, though they won’t be there for long. The mountains of Lembang are beautiful, and the air is still clean. Bali is spectacular, I can fully understand why the rest of Muslim Indonesia hates it…It’s paradise & the Hindus are running the show! Also, from my best observations, Bali is the last stronghold of the master craftsmen of Indonesia. There are entire villages devoted to a particular facet of fine art, be it wood carving, stone carving, painting, handcrafts, you name it. The weapons of Bali are of a particularly fine quality, and far surpass those of the Empu (weapons masters) of central Java. My best weapons, outside of two or three exceptions from the Sunda region, are Balinese.

Of course, the training was excellent, and the curry & coffee were still food of the Gods, as far as I was concerned, but I’ll write about that in another posting. But I had a long, troubled flight back to America, and I finally came to the conclusion that I could never again return to Indonesia. I don’t want my memories of this once beautiful land replaced by visions of an industrial slum.