Broken Horizon

Part One:

"Don't Tell Mom I'm a Grunt, She Thinks I Play Piano in a Whorehouse."

Have you ever reached that point to where you just don't give a shit? If you have then you'll understand why I did what I did. It's really the realization more than anything, like a dawning sunrise after three months of rain. (Huh. Poetic. This is why Severs calls me a fag. If he wasn’t dyslexic, our friendship would be really lopsided. Fucking retard.)

Lemme put that another way:

It’s like waking the fuck up, and you’re still in the nightmare. Wide awake.

My track had been commandeered by Alpha Company to be used as a barrier. I was flat footed in the fucking open, and I seriously doubted the army cared how I was getting back. We had been left here to die, which, if you want to know the truth, was my turning point. If they didn’t care…

"What the hell are we going to do now?" Severs asked. His eyes were bloodshot from lack of sleep. He was reloading a magazine as he took cover behind a dumpster. We had been fighting for almost 48 hours, and it was taking a toll. With so many raiders, it was only a matter of time before the fuckers caught up with us.

There was an army combat Humvee with no occupants inside on the other side of the post. Most of Alpha Company was occupied with erecting the barricade, the rest were gathering ammo. I picked up five cans of ammunition lying in the nearby pile and gave two of them to Severs. As he stowed them into his rucksack, a large group of raiders rounded the corner with—Flamethrowers. Oh shit oh dear. They opened up with a barrage of automatic weapons fire, and caught Alpha with their pants down. Half the company was erased before they got their shit together enough to return fire.

Severs was standing there with his mouth agape, staring at the fight in front of him. "Come on!" I screamed at him and sprinted through the shitstorm of bullets and screaming, ducking as we ran. The raiders were temporarily pinned down, but they had reinforcements coming. All we had was a shredded battalion spread out over a large metropolitan area, playing by the book, and we were covered only by a few empty fuel Humvees that were rapidly growing holes

Severs stayed right on my heels as I bashed anything that came my way with the butt of the M-16. We dodged and sprinted a good six blocks before finally reaching the Humvee. Severs scanned the lot while I dug for the keys. "What are you doing?" he asked as I climbed into the driver's seat.

"Resigning." I said.

Severs looked stricken. "Are you insane?" He screamed. "They'll kill you."

"Have you ever been to the Grand Canyon?"

"The Grand…What? No!"

"Neither have I," I said. "And that's really a shame because I'm from Arizona."

“Robbie…We can’t just scamper and leave those guys to die. They’re counting on us.”

“And that’s too fucking bad.” I countered “I really wish there was another way Severs, but it’s either let them die or die with them. Either way, staying here is a losing bet. Nobody’s coming back for us, man!”

“Rob--"

“LISTEN!” I cut him off “Our guys are going like lambs to the fucking slaughter! Anybody with half a brain has either cut and run, or they’re back at Haven. This is it, man.”

He just stood there dumbly in the wisdom of my logic, the rifle hanging low. I could see the struggle going on, and I didn’t want to let him make a stupid decision he wouldn’t live long enough to regret. I reached out and pushed him towards the front of the Humvee.

"Come on, we’re outta here," I said “I’ve had it with this happy horseshit.”

We drove all night without sleep down Interstate 25. Once in a while we'd see a car driving back in the opposite direction but there was very little else in terms of traffic.

Severs was silent for most of the drive. I could see him working out the alternative scenarios, and I knew he was hating himself for abandoning the unit. I didn’t say anything. Better to just let him see it on his own time.

We finally pulled over into an abandoned truck stop outside Las Vegas, New Mexico and got some sleep. No one followed us or even attempted to stop us. The checkpoints that were active months earlier were abandoned, some had even been looted. It was much worse out here than we were led to believe. I had doubts about my timing before, fearing I had left too early, that they’d track us & we’d hang for desertion. Now I was worried that we had bolted too late.

We slept in the Humvee, preferring to wait until daylight to do our exploring.

The next morning while Severs was still asleep I climbed out of the Humvee and took a piss next to the side of the road. I absently checked my cigarettes, and was dismayed to find my pack was empty. Fuck. Now we REALLY needed to get some supplies. I decided to let Severs sleep in as I explored the truck stop. Normally I wouldn’t risk it, but I could sense we were pretty much alone here. Also, I wanted Severs to have some time to come around. I knew how he was feeling, hell, I was feeling that way too. Nobody can ever choose the lady or the tiger. Even if you survive, you carry it with you.

Fucking paydirt. The windows were still intact, and it looked like the shelves were still stocked. This was a gift horse from God, and I wasn’t gonna start counting teeth. I couldn’t believe no one had touched this place in, what, Three months now? My guess is the people who would normally be here were stranded in other places too far to walk from, or it was forgotten about after the initial panic. We were out pretty far off the beaten path here, and off the reservation for that matter. I started back to wake Severs.

The past month taught me to take my weapon everywhere, so I wasn't caught off guard when I noticed a small Volkswagen bug, approaching from about half a mile away. Well, well. Wasn’t this a coincidence? A shitty little runabout like that doesn’t have the legs for serious distance. It’s driver must be a local boy. I walked to the back of the Humvee and waited for the vehicle to stop. An older man with a huge stomach tucked under a long white beard and baseball cap climbed out of the drivers seat. He had a .357 magnum holstered at his side. In the passenger seat was a young Hispanic woman holding a little girl. Looked to be about two years old, thereabouts.

"Howdy," the old man smiled.

"Hello," I replied.

"Name's Bud," he extended his hand. "Wonder if I couldn't get some gas from you."

"What about this gas station?"

"I don't know if you noticed or not," he laughed. "But the power's been out since last week."

"I didn't notice," I said.

"You alone here," he asked. "No other army people around?"

"Just me," I lied.

"Where you coming from?"

"Colorado Springs," I said. "Our command post was overrun last night."

"Any survivors?" He asked.

"I don't know."

"So you deserted."

"I escaped."

"I know how it is," he laughed. "I was a soldier once too."

I was feeling like a fat cow in a field of hungry wolves. Shit, I should have thought that my uniform and vehicle would make me a target for the needy. I was probably a sight for sore eyes. I represented hope. I knew it would be hard to explain that the army was as disorganized as everyone else.

"But like I was saying," Bud continued. "Think we could get some gas?"

I felt strange. "Who's the girl?"

"Maria?" He smiled and waved at her. She gave him a dirty look. I noticed she had a black eye and her lip was split. "She's just my traveling companion. Comes in handy if you know what I mean."

"Well," I said. "I'm sorry but I have no fuel. Tank's out."

"Really?" He scratched his head. "Well how bout if I just take your gun?"

"I don't think so," I said just as he pistol-whipped me with his revolver. I fell face down on my half-unslung rifle and felt him pull it the rest of the way off my arm.

Godammit, this was just lovely. I managed to turn over, but couldn’t focus my blurry world.

"How old are you boy?" Bud continued as if nothing had happened. "Twenty? Twenty-one? You have no fucking clue how things are working now, do ya?" He checked to see if the M-16 was loaded then slung it over his shoulder. He lowered the pistol and pointed it at my head. "I'm doing you a favor."

A quick burst of gunfire and Bud's chest exploded. His arms flailed outward and he fell on his ass. He tried to examine the three holes in his chest but then lost consciousness and collapsed. Severs walked over with his weapon still drawn on the old bandit.

I tried to stand, but only managed to my knees. "Good timing." I mumbled. “Fucking cavalry.”

"Dumbass. We get out of one fight and you go mosey on into another. How's your head, not that I care?"

"Ungh…one piece, feels like."

“So there is a Dog”.

“Retard”

“Fag”

Somewhere in the fog it occurred to me to check the other traveler. She looked like she had gone into shock. Her eyes were bulging and for a moment she ignored the crying baby in her lap. Severs noticed her for the first time and raised his rifle in her direction.

"It's okay!" She screamed. "It's okay! Really! I didn't do anything!"

I stood up and walked over to Bud's dead body. I checked his wallet and looked for anything useful. All I could find was a pack of cigarettes that weren't even my brand and his shiny revolver.

"He kidnapped me!" She cried. "He beat me! Please!"

Maria got out of the car holding the still crying baby stood by the door. Severs slung his weapon and patted her down, then he rummaged around inside the car. I lit a cigarette and tossed the match on Bud. I wasn’t sure about “Maria”, and the stress of that week crowned with the knock on my head had put me into a fucking foul mood. I fingered my Baretta, and considered putting a round into her anyway just for the fuck of it. That’s a cold thing to say, but shit, I didn’t know what her story was. For all I knew, Maria was part of a two-man operation that Severs and I had just busted up. Maybe shed’ kill us later, when our guard was down, who knew?

Severs emerged from the car with a box of bullets, a carton of cigarettes, some beef jerky and a rather large bag of weed. "I thought I smelled something," he said. The smile froze on his face as he appraised me. I guess he could tell what I was thinking, and his body English shifted almost imperceptibly. “Hey boy, watchoo thinkin’?”

“Dunno. Just thinkin’”

Maria had seen the look on my face as well, and her eyes were wide with fear. She knew I was weighing her life out, and the scales weren’t balancing.

Severs came over and spoke to me in low, modulated tones, pitching his voice so only I could hear. “Now look, way I see it, we’re runners. We’re out here to live. We do what we do to make it where we’re goin’ alive. One thing I know, we ain’t raiders, now, we don’t want no part of that.” He opened the bag of pot and held it up to my face “You get a nose fulla this right ‘chere.” As the rich pungent smell of cannabis wafted to my face, I let my senses come back to me. “That’s for later. Now shag some ass and get those hoses connected. I’ll rig a pump for the fuel lines.”

The spell broken, we lapsed into our old system of bonding through degradation. “I didn’t realize a retard could work a pump, let alone rig one. Huh. Amazing what they can teach a monkey to do these days.”

“I wouldn’t worry about me rigging it so much as you trying to suck it, twinkle toes” he retorted, “Which, you may have to do if I’m too autistic to figure this thing out. Knowing you, you’ll probably sabotage it just for th’ opportunity”

“Well, let me know if you have any problems there, Algernon. I think the instructions are written in crayon if you need a manual or something.”

Maria just stood stock still, probably not comprehending that she had missed the noose. I could see tears forming in her eyes. “Oye, chica, tu habla English?” I purposely insulted her previous use of the language to shock her back to reality. I didn’t think she would cow at it, and a little righteous indignation would get her into the swing of things.

I was right. “Yes, I speak perfect English. Better than your Espanol, que no?”

“Correctomundo. I don’t speak dishwasher.” I pulled a pair of binocs from the front of the Humvee as a scowl spread across her face. Even when I’m making a joke, my shit stings. “Check our horizon. Scan left to right, in a slow pattern. You see anything, a crow, a car, the tour bus for the Backstreet Boys or Jesus dragging the cross, you give a holler. Understand?”

Maria glanced into my eyes, the nervousness showing through. I gave her a shrug. “No worries, chica. Go be lookout. We need to get to work.”

So we now had two more traveling companions. The baby, Evie, took a liking to me and insisted on sitting on my lap as we made our way west. Kids have always took to me, despite my annoyance at them. I’m not a child person. Evie feasted on some rations of vacuum-sealed pineapple and applesauce. Maria ate what was left of the jerky. Severs drove down Interstate 40 now with his eyes darting all over the place looking for any activity, military or otherwise. From time to time we took side roads when it was convenient. No sense in advertising. No telling who was still out there, and we would have a bastard of a time explaining unit markings on a military vehicle so far from our post.

I checked my watch. The date read June 21st. Three months to day after this had all started.

"Where are we going?"

"South." I told her. "South and away from everything. Does your baby usually eat this much?"

"She hasn't eaten in two days," Maria sighed. "Thank you so much."

"Where should we look for shelter?" Severs asked. “We need to stay away from populated areas. People are turning into fucking cannibals out there.”

"Santa Fe maybe," Maria said. She eyed us, still in our fatigues. "So where's the rest of the army?"

"Scattered, smothered and covered" I said. "Wounded, probably. Dead, likely. Most of them either died or ran. We left last night."

"There’s no Army?" Maria sounded extremely anxious.

"There’s no nothing," Severs said.